Divorce Shock

I felt lost, devastated, wouldn't you? I never ever dreamed in a million years that my husband of twenty-five years would look at me and say those dreaded words, "I love you, but I am not in love with you, and I want a divorce!" He quickly followed that by saying, "You have five days to pack your things and leave, or I will change the locks on the doors of our home." Bank accounts were emptied.

I was in a state of total shock and disbelief. This happened to OTHER people, not Christian women who took a vow "til death do us part." The pain ranged from numbness to pain like I have never felt before. It felt as if I was going to die, in fact, the pain was so intense I felt like this rejection might kill me. How could this be? How could he look at me so coldly?

Later, I discovered that later that same day as I made a small stab at packing, that he had ordered a dozen yellow roses for "her." How could he? I still don't understand it.

I found a new church where I attend a weekly DivorceRecovery group and the women on the videos that we watch as we share tissues has helped me so very much. These people have been where I am. I am reading everything written on divorce recovery and how to survive it, before I am plunged into the next PIT of despair. Turning to the Bible and relearning how to pray like nothing else matters has made EVERYTHING matter again. God has been the salvation of my existence, my emotional stability and my next breath. I am learning to depend utterly and completely on Him.